Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Eight A.M.

Well it is eight a.m. the morning before Christmas Eve. The babies are still sleeping. The teenagers are still sleeping. And even the other children are sleeping. Heather just awoke and is eating her breakfast.

My blogging time is very limited right now since I am so busy with the babies and the family overall. However, I just want to update the "happenings" around here.

Our oldest son arrived home this past Sunday. He will be living with us until he finds his next step. He will be 20 years old in March! We are so happy to have him home and all of the younger children are so happy to have him here too!

Joshua, our 7th child celebrated his 7th birthday on the same day of Bradley's arrival home. So the whole family got to celebrate together! It was a great day. And it was also the twins 6 week birthday.

I love the Christmas season. It has always been one of my favorite times of the year. To be honest though, it really does not feel like the holidays to me. Maybe it is because of the whirlwind of transition we have been through the last month and a half. But I really want to relax and reflect on our Savior and His birth.

The birth of two new babies in our family is really a challenge. I have struggled with a lot of anxiety since their birth. When I shared this with my doctor she told me that I am a strong lady. I said, "If I was really strong I would be "handling things a lot better!" She said, "No. Strength is when you realize you need help and you ask for it. Weakness is when you know you need help and you keep it to yourself."
I guess you can tell I have a great doctor.

Needless to say, I am not one to take medications except a Tylenol or Advil here and there. But now I am on an anti-depressant/anxiety medication to help me until my body gets back to some kind of normal. Why am I sharing this? I think because I just want people to know that we have to give ourselves grace. This is so hard to do especially for women.

We tend to be harder on ourselves than we really need to be. There are so many pressures from without and within our own selves to be this and accomplish that. And I admit that I tend to be one of those people.

For example, when the babies were born, so many people reached out to us. We had food galore brought in by various families, and help with the house and children. Also, we received so wonderful gifts. The babies are 6 weeks old and I have not written one thank you note. Talk about guilt.....I feel guilty because I want all of those wonderful people to know how grateful I am for all of the love they gave to our family. Pressure and guilt....that is enough to make one anxious.

I know I am not alone in how I am feeling. Christmas is a time to focus on the Lord. However, the simplicity of the season and the joy of it all seems to get smothered under all the pressures we put upon ourselves.

So my prayer is that I can just let go of all of this and just savor the beauty of the Lord. This is my prayer for all mothers....that our joy will be full!

For those of you reading this who have reached out to our family during this time...your words of encouragement, your gifts, your time and service means more to us than you may realize. I say thank you! And may God return to you in a special way all you have given.

Merry Christmas with much love!



Karen said...


Thanks for the update! I have been thinking about you alot and keeping you in my prayers. I know your heart must be greatful to have your son home.

I know bringing 2 new babies into your life must bring great challenges.Bringing one is cahllenging enough. I know you are thankful to have them. Don't be too hard on yourself. Give yourself some grace. You have many people to take care of plus those precious babies. The Thank Yous can wait. People will understand. Most probably do not expect it anyway!

I pray that Christmas will be the most special time for your family. I also pray for you and for me that our Joy will be full!

Merry Christmas!

kblair said...

I love you, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. Psalm 18:1-3

He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support. he brought me out into a spacious place; he RESCUED ME because he delighted in me. Psalm 18:16-19

Merry Christmas. I love you!

supplies overflowing! said...

Oh Ange...Anyone with even just one child can appreciate the upheaval of changes that go on in a household when that one beautiful baby arrives. Do not feel guilty about 6 weeks, though I can understand your feelings. I am like you in that, the fact that a thank you hasn't been written eats away at me until it is done. But you must give you and your family time to settle in- and with the excitment of Christmas...well, maybe in January, or February things will quiet down a bit- or even March. Don't worry.
Hey- listen to this- we went to a wedding in JUNE- I even mentioned it in an old post. We still haven't received a thank you for the gift. Nor have my mom, brother, sister, or cousins. This is a couple with no children. Just the two of them.
Then there was another party that we went to in JULY, a party to "meet the bride-to-be" and yup- you guessed it- no thank you from them either! I don't get it!
Do not feel guilty! You have a lot going on! I would understand. I do understand!
And now your oldest is home! I am so happy for you! Enjoy him!
Please don't fret!


supplies overflowing! said...

PS- that dr. is ownderful!