Sunday, March 14, 2010

It's Just Me Being Me!

I found this little wire basket at Goodwill and made it into a candle holder!

When I awoke this morning something felt totally different! The babies! They both slept through the night! Wow, I felt so refreshed! I jumped out of bed to feed little Maggie. And as I sat in the rocker cuddling her, my eyes swept over the family room area. We had all forgotten to tidy up before bed. There were toys on the floor, the sofa pillows were disheveled, and a few cups were sitting around. I thought to myself, "It sure would be embarrassing if someone popped in right now for a visit."

This is my favorite.....a tiny tea pot which fits on top of the tea cup! It is adorable and I only paid 4.99 for it!

As I sat rocking and rocking little Maggie in the middle of the dowdy family room, I had some other thoughts. I wonder why I get so stressed about my messy house when I know someone is coming over? It's like another personality emerges as I dart around everywhere to straighten up. And why do I find it humiliating at times for someone to come into my home and see that I actually live in it instead of staging it for a photo shoot with Better Homes and Gardens? A house that is lived in is gonna have mess, especially if 13 people live there. I'm preaching to myself!!

I also scooped up this little goody for 99 cents. I already had the candles.

As I continually inquired and pondered my own heart I thought, "Surely I am not alone! There has to be other women who do the know, live in their homes with stuff everywhere. Then I envisioned some of my other dear friends as they maybe get all frantic like me when company is coming. And what about when someone shows up the door unexpectedly? We have piles of shoes in the foyer and the inside looks like a daycare center. So sometimes I stand in the door way hoping the surprise visitor will not peek around me and see what our life is really like! Is it a matter of fear? pride? or dignity?

This little ceramic pot brightens up the kitchen with its yellow lemon cheer! Price was only 3.99

Well, to be perfectly honest I think it is a mix of all these. I don't want people to know that I really am not all that organized. After all, a mom of 11 should be really organized, right? And I do not want someone to judge me as a person because I have have dust on my coffee table and crumbs on the kitchen floor. It can made a woman feel naked sometimes when others see you do not have it quite "as together" as they might think. Honestly ladies? I cannot be the only one!
This little shelf was only 4.99, so I picked it up to hang in my daughter's room.

So you see, I am just being me...real and sometimes very vulnerable. You know why? Because I am not the only one who sometimes struggles with these human fractures. Now I know what my perspective should be. I should clean when I can and not worry so much about it. And when I do clean before company comes it should be with the motive of doing it out of respect and the comfort of others. I mean who wants to sit down at my table with cheerios in the chairs? And who really wants to walk into the guest bathroom with poop floating in the toilet because a darling little 5 year old forgot to flush? You getting my point folks?

Needless to say, God uses my messy house to teach me a lot of valuable lessons. When I clean my home, I should joyfully accomplish the tasks with other's in mind, not my own. I mean, who really cares? Am I frantically scrubbing and organizing to make myself feel more in control? Or am I doing it for a show? And if I am spending so much time scrubbing and less time hugging and kissing those sweet kiddos, then I am cheating them and myself. And I sure do not want to miss out on the best things in life. Dust will hang around forever, but children will grow up and move on. I have to seize each day and praise God for my messy house!!! Dust, dust, I know you won't go away, so I'll clean you up another day!


kblair said...

So no one else commented on your "messy" post? Well let me chime in - you are not alone!
I get a little frantic when someone like my Mother in Law comes over because I feel like I'm going to be judged. I am human too!
In the end though, I KNOW it's not my things or my perfect house that gives me value.

Ange said...

Hey Karla, You are so sweet...thank you for leaving a comment. Thank you for being real!!! I think more people do this than are willing to admit.I love what you said, "It is not my things or my perfect house that give me value" LOVE YOU KARLA!!