The faithfulness of God is beyond my wildest dreams and expectations. It is so amazing to watch the loving heavenly Father step into every detail of my life and answer prayers that I pray in secret. He truly understands a mother's heart. And all the concerns and petitions of a mother seem to always line up with the intentions of God's own heart.
For example, I will often begin to become anxious in a certain area in one of my children's lives. So I will say out loud, "Lord, I need to talk with you." So I will steal away the first chance I get. Sometimes I will sit in my big chair by my bedroom window and gaze at the two palm trees in the back yard. I will rest and talk to my Dad about what is on my mind. Then other times I will sit in my tub or on the toilet (just being transparent here with the practical ways of God) and picture Him sitting by me intently listening. And other times I will chat with Him as I am making my bed in the mornings. However, my favorite time is when I go to bed as I usually turn in before my husband. I love to lay there and just thank the Lord for the day. I enjoy reviewing all the events whether stressful, fun, or just mundane. Then I share my gratitude with Him that He has been with me all day in the midst of everyday life. I love how such a mysterious God can be so simple and practical. It makes me feel secure to know He sits with me and hangs out at my house no matter what is going on! Wow, even writing about this gets me excited.
However, I have been thinking about the "mothering burdens" that seem to come upon me so often. When I go to my places of prayer, my confidence in my Dad grows as I watch Him address all of my concerns for my children. He takes care of it.He listens to my heart, nods His head "yes" and says, "Don't worry, I'll take care of them."
For example, this season of letting go of my oldest son has been challenging at times. I have felt frustration as well as pride as I watch him grow in manhood. He lives far away in Georgia and I have no control over any area of his life any longer. He is a young man now. He always belonged to God. But now the reality of that has set in.
There have been times over the past 9 months that I have felt concerned about him because things did not go as "I thought they should" in the choices he was making. So I have taken my worry to the Lord, for now that is all that is left to do. Prayer for my oldest child has led me to new levels of giving up control each time that tendency to want to still act as "mommy" in his life.
Furthermore, the excitement of watching what God is doing in my son's life confirms to me constantly that God has him in His grasp and He is not going to let my son go.You see, it is about Bradley and God now....the two of them together. And as I witness the hand of the Lord upon His life, I am seeing all kind of fruit. The grapes of that joyful, laid back spirit that Bradley has possessed since he was a baby has only grown. There are apples of wisdom being imparted as he learns valuable lessons through the school of life. And the strawberries of consideration, honor and respect are shining through his life as I watch him take initiative to pursue God, stay in touch with his family, and just love people.
For example, he has remembered everyone in the family's birthday this year...sent cards with money and gift cards. For Mother's Day he sent me a Bath and Body works gift card with a beautiful note thanking me for always putting my family first. Well, I am telling you this does something to a mother's heart that cannot be explained until you start experiencing it. You watch your child becoming the respectful and thoughtful person God is making him to be and you know you cannot take the credit. It is the powerful reminder that God has been there all along cultivating peace in the life of your child.
Another thing I love to watch is how the Lord has used dry seasons of Bradley's young journey to remind him of how much he needs God's presence in his life. He just told his Dad the other day in an email that he has been in a funk the last few months and admitted that he has been distant from God. However, the Lord gave him the understanding that he cannot make it in life without Jesus and knowing Him. When I read this, there were tears of joy seeping out of my heart as I watch my daily prayer for my kids being answered...that they would love the Lord with all of their heart, soul, mind and strength. And I know God is working that into Him! Whew! I am pumped!! I am encouraged that if that one prayer is answered, the rest of their lives will be filled with the abundance of a kingdom life. This is my heart for my kids and it is even more so God's heart for them.
The faithfulness of God is the divine heart of all creation "faith-full" to fulfill the wishes of His desire for His children. If God has that kind of faith, then He is faithful to to fill my own heart with the same. I can always count on Him!
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